Stop Playing Athletes Just to Please Parents

Coaches, if you're putting a player into the game simply to satisfy their parents, you're making a mistake.

Here is why.

By the time you're thinking about putting that athlete in, they've often spent the entire game sitting on the bench with their head down, wondering why they aren't playing. They're battling disappointment, frustration, self-doubt, and every negative thought imaginable. Psychologically, they're usually not in the best place to perform.

Then, because you feel pressure from the parents, you decide it's finally time to put them in.

What happens next?

Many times, the player struggles because they weren't mentally prepared. Now the coach thinks, "See, I told you she wasn't ready."  The parents become frustrated. The athlete feels even worse. Nobody wins.

Now let's look at the opposite scenario.

If that same player has been fully engaged—cheering for teammates, paying attention, staying mentally locked in, and showing she's ready whenever her number is called—that's a completely different situation. A coach can feel confident that she's emotionally prepared to compete.

Intent matters.

As coaches, we have to ask ourselves one simple question:

Why am I putting this player into the game?

Is it because it's the best baseball or softball decision?

Or is it because I feel pressure from the parents?

Those are two very different reasons.

If your goal is to win the game, the last inning of a close contest is usually not the time to insert a player who hasn't been part of the flow of the game. If she struggles, you've unintentionally set her up to fail.

Talent gets noticed. Attitude keeps you in the lineup. Keep swinging. 🥎💪

At the same time, if you're using that moment to "prove a point," that's just as unhealthy.

Players should never become part of a coach's agenda.

Could someone argue that adversity is a learning opportunity? Absolutely.

But these are still children.

Our responsibility as coaches is to create environments where they have the best opportunity to succeed not to knowingly place them in situations where failure is the most likely outcome.