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Excerpt from Chapter 28 of Naive Perceptions by Tammy Evans (Coming Spring 2026) Repair Guide — The Journey Forward: Embracing the Healing Process

TeachCoachParent To my reader: This excerpt is from my personal book, Naive Perceptions. I hope you find it enjoyable, as I have dedicated countless hours to crafting a better future for our children and yours. Part III: Changing the Culture of Sports — From Shame to Leadership Introduction Sports were my sanctuary and my battleground. I learned discipline under the lights, but I also learned how shame can hide in plain sight—behind trophies, travel bags, and sideline smi

Developing at 12 U When my daughter turned twelve, I saw her steady hands, eager mind, and a heartfelt desire to learn the game—not the politics. With my background in coaching and education, I decided this was the year for her to step out on her own. While her friends moved up to 14 u, she was ready to test her skills as a competitive 12 u player on a team of her own. She aimed for the highest A and B level organizations in the state, known for having top-notch pitchers. I

Identity Before Outcome - How Unconditional Support kept injuries from Defining Makay. In my book Naive Perceptions , I discuss how sports became my entire identity. I sought approval, played through pain, and let victories and defeats determine my self-worth. Makay’s story is intentionally different. After learning lessons with my older daughter, Daylin, I vowed to provide unconditional support rather than control, allowing my children to develop identities beyond any scoreb

Reflecting on my journey as a parent brings back memories of my oldest daughter’s early athletic endeavors. Those days were filled with excitement and high hopes, but they also carried the heavy weight of expectations. As a former Division I softball player and coach, I believed I was setting my daughter up for success by introducing her to the sport I loved. What I failed to see was that my enthusiasm may have been steering her away from her true passions. Watching my daught

Teaching Without Shame: A Practical Guide for Youth Sports Coaches, Parents, and Players By Tammy Evans, author of Naive Perceptions (forthcoming) Youth sports can shape a child for life—but too often, the lesson that lands is shame : “I am a failure,” instead of “I made a mistake.” Shame shuts kids down. It erodes confidence, feeds anxiety, and quietly pushes talented athletes out of the game. This article gives you a field-tested playbook —scripts, drills, sideline norm

Changing the culture of sports -From shame to Leadership By Tammy Evans This insert is taken from my personal book " Naive Perceptions ". by Tammy Evans (This is a sneak peak to be released Spring 2026) For leadership in your program now, contact us for help. Part III: Changing the Culture of Sports — From Shame to Leadership Introduction Sports were my sanctuary and my battleground. I learned discipline under the lights, but I also learned how shame can hide in plain s

Starting a new travel program can be both an exciting and overwhelming experience for coaches. The success of your program hinges not only on how well you teach your players but also on how effectively you communicate with them and their parents. This post will delve into key communication strategies that can help create a positive atmosphere, build trust, and ensure everyone is aligned and informed. Be Transparent About Your Coaching Philosophy A crucial first step in launc

Youth sports should be a realm of joy, growth, and camaraderie. Yet, an undercurrent of shame often permeates this environment, impacting athletes, coaches, and parents alike. As a parent of five children involved in various sports and a former Division I athlete, I have witnessed the severe consequences of this shame. My experiences have equipped me with valuable insights into the numerous challenges faced by young athletes today. It is crucial to examine this issue and shif

When my son was 12, he was the strongest and fiercest football player among his peers. The jealousy from his coaches, whose sons lacked his strength, height, or competitive edge, became apparent through their words and actions. They unjustly punished him by placing him in the middle of a ring, where he endured head trauma from blindside hits from other players. This was the first time he came home in tears, openly expressing his sadness to us. He was later subjected to name-c